Oi Vey.

If you have my Facebook you know that the feces has once again hit the rotating cooling device. Aaron and I got into a fight about some stupid shit, and everything that's been building up pretty much crumbled. Fuck it. I'm so done being his safety net and his back up plan. If he wants me, he's going to have to commit to me or lose me. His choice. I'm done waiting around. Every time I try to move on and go out with other guys he gets all jealous and possessive long enough for me to drop the other guy thinking Aaron and I getting back together. Once he knows he has me waiting a little longer before he has to commit, he starts acting like an ass again. I'm not going to play these games. Not anymore. I'm going to do my thing, and I'm not going to sit and wait for him when he starts acting like we're getting back together. When he comes to me and says we ARE getting back together-if I still want him-fine. Great. Dandy. If not, he's going to lose me to someone who will commit and treat me like a freakin' human being. Whatever. On a related but somewhat different note, this is one of my songs about Aaron that I've been listening to before we got in that stupid fight.

When I sleep
I have dreams about the way we used to kiss
About the way you used to hold me
And say nothin would ever harm me
When we first met
Oh how you charmed me
Made me smile when I was down
Big pimpin' around the town
You and me
Whenever they'd see you
They'd see me
A lover and a friend to me you were
How did it end
How it hurts
To not have you in my life
when I wanted to be your wife

You never know what you have
Till it's gone
Treated you wrong
For so long
Now you're gone away
But the love still lives here

I still got love for you
After what we've been through
I gave my heart to you
And baby you're the only one

There's other men than you
They can't come close to you
Once I said I love you
I knew you'd be the only one

A good man you were to me
Always there to care
Would do anything in this world for me
Didn't matter, what, when, or where
You were there
I never thought we'd part from the arguments we'd start
When I just wanted to get some attention
And I'm sorry baby for bitchin
If I could take back the words
That I said to make you leave
I'd be down on bended knees
Asking you to please forgive me

You never know what you have
Till it's gone
Treated you wrong
For so long
Now you're gone away
But the love still lives here

I still got love for you
After what we've been through
I gave my heart to you
And baby you're the only one

There's other men than you
They can't come close to you
Once I said I love you
I knew you'd be the only one

All of the good times we had together
Do they mean something to you
Do you ever wish we'd never split
Still got love for you...

I still got love for you
After what we've been through
I gave my heart to you
And baby you're the only one

There's other men than you
They can't come close to you
Once I said I love you
I knew you'd be the only one

I still got love for you
After what we've been through
I gave my heart to you
And baby you're the only one

There's other men than you
They can't come close to you
Once I said I love you
I knew you'd be the only one

"Still" - Jennifer Lopez