I Feel Invisible

WTF? Okay, before I dated Aaron I had no romantic prospects what so ever. As soon as Aaron and I got together, I had guys coming out of the woodwork wanting to date me. The day Aaron and I break up, they all disappear again. -_-;; I just want someone to hit on me or something. Make me feel better. I feel so bleh right now. I need some kind of flirtation or interest to help me get back out there. To keep me from sitting here waiting for Aaron because I've already decided I'm not going to waste my life doing that. But unless I have someone else to think about or flirt with, my mind just keeps going back to him. Ay, ay, ay. I don't want a boyfriend or anything. I just want to feel like there are guys out there who would date me if given that chance. That sounds bad doesn't it? : / But I'm sure you girls know what I mean. When guys flirt with you it makes you feel special. Even if you would never give that guy a chance at a real relationship with you, it's still nice to know you have options. Not that you're stringing anyone along, but that there are guys out there who want to date you. I had plenty of guys flirting with me last semester. And now that Aaron and I are broken up I've got nothing. Psh. Men. I'll never understand them. The one guy I had some interest in isn't really talking to me very much this semester. T-T Maybe if we had a class together it would be different, but I can't spend my life thinking about the 'what ifs'. Poo. This sucks. I don't really need a guy all the time right now. I just want someone to make me smile sometimes. Someone to call me up randomly or hint that he likes me with things he says in everyday conversation. I miss that giddy school girl feeling of flirtation. I've given up on getting that from Aaron right now. And I'm not going to depend on it happening later. Because I don't know what's going to happen with him. What I want and what is going to happen are very different things. I can't keep kidding myself with all of this stuff about knowing things will be okay. Because things aren't okay. And who knows if they ever will be. I really wish this other guy would flippin' talk to me so I wouldn't feel so completely hopeless. Haha. I'm not trying to track him down for a relationship. Just some harmless flirting. The kind he kept using on me before he found out I was taken. Haha. But we still stayed friends so that meant something to me. But we're both busy with different classes and friends this semester so I haven't heard from him much, like I said before. I wish he would just send me a MySpace message or SOMETHING. XD I sound so desperate. Eh. Oh well. Such is the story of my life.